Ok. I am a little freaked out to be honest. I am going to start a business soon…. from home–selling things online. I was so pumped out yesterday and now I am having all sort of bad dreams about the business that has not yet started. Am I too overreacted? Am I just nervous? Is this normal?
I have so much expectation with my new venture. I cannot fail on this project. I have to succeed. I cannot accept failure anymore. I have so much hopes on this new venture.
Maybe I am pressuring myself too much but this new venture is going to cost me some money so it better works.
I was feeling depressed today almost all day. I was thinking about work and all of the sudden my mood changed from happy to depressing. I don’t think I can last any longer in my work. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it so much. I just don’t know how to handle it right now. I don’t know how we can afford me quiting the job. I can sell my car and that will eliminate one car payment. Then we can get rid of stuff from the storage. I have to pick up sewing again soon. I cannot wait any longer.
I can start selling my handmade items on Etsy, my personal website, and also at the arts market.
My sewing machine is not working great right now. I am so mad. Now I am looking into purchasing another one. A better quality one. Something that can handle many sewing hours.
Ok I am sleepy and tired. Better go to sleep. Tomorrow is Sunday. I am going to church again. I went today and it was so weird because the message from today’s mass was that if you believe in God, and if you ask anything, it will be done. I don’t know why I cried all of the sudden after hearing the message. I knew God was talking to me. I knew He was sending me an assurance that everything is going to be ok. I do have faith in God. I have been praying everynight for Him to grant me a way so I can financially afford to quit my job. Something’s got to happen. Something’s got to work out somehow. I don’t know what it is but things got to be better. I have to find ways to make myself happy. I am going to start looking for another job. Keep my fingers crossed. Perhaps I can do part-time job and I can use the other half to run my business from home.
God, please hear my prayers. Help me please. Help.
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I have been feeling weird lately. My tummy just does not feel good at all. So last night, my husband took me to get pregnancy test at Walgreens. I was going to test myself last night but I thought I’d do it the next day.
So this morning I took the pregnancy test and I got 2 lines, which means I am pregnant–one is lighter than the other. I told my husband.
Well, we might be pregnant!!!!!!!!
My period is supposed to be next week on Tuesday. So… it is still early. However, we did get the pregnancy test that can be used 5 days sooner.
I am excited. And I hope my husband too. I am praying so that I am positively pregnant. I am going to test myself again this weekend using different pregnancy tests. And if I get all positive results, I will call my doctor to confirm my pregnancy.
I am happy but nervous at the same time. I have so much to think about. We need to save more money. We need to fix the house. We have a fence we need to install. We need to fix the kitchen. We have to buy new washer and dryer. I want to quit my job after the baby is born. All these roll into one. I don’t know how we can afford everything. I don’t know how we can do everything at the same time…..
I will turn everything to God. God heard my prayers!!! He heard my prayer to get pregnant. After months asking, He finally grants me a pregnancy (keep my fingers crossed). And He knows I have been asking for a way so I can financially afford to quit my job. And I know with all my heart, God will find me a way. I know that. There is no doubt in my heart at all. I have faith in him.
Thank you Jesus. Thank you Virgin Mary.
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It has been a one long week for me. Tomorrow is Friday. Since I will be on call this weekend, I have to say I am not too looking forward to the weekend. I probably will take it easy. I won’t be going out much. Just stay at home I suppose.
My work situation hasn’t improved. Still the same. I am still dreading it everyday. Seems like an eternity my time at work. I hate it. Oh how I pray everyday begging Virgin Mary and Jesus to please show me a way so I can afford to quit my job. That is all I want.
All my other prayers have been answered by God. A friend at work asked me to pray so she becomes pregnant. I did and it turns out that she is indeed pregnant. I am so happy for her. This week another friend of mine and I signed up for a sewing class but the teacher was not sure if she would have enough people sign up as she would need to have 10 students in the class in order for the class not to be canceled. Today was the last day to sign up and 30 minutes before the deadline, there were only 8 people signed up. My friend called and asked me to pray quickly so that the class won’t be canceled. We really want to take this particular sewing class together. So, I prayed to Jesus and Virgin Mary. And 30 minutes later I called the teacher and she told me that the class was not canceled.
You see, Virgin Mary and Jesus hear prayers. I don’t care what people say I believe that they will always answer my prayers. Some prayers will be answered faster than others.
I am praying so my husband and I will hear a pregnancy news soon.
I pray and beg everyday so that Jesus and Mary will show me a way to afford quiting my job. I told them I would like to open my own business with my husband. I know the economy is tough right now but I know with God by myside, nothing is impossible.
I want to be happy in my life. I want to live a happy life with my husband and my future children.
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My husband and I bought a gently used baby bassinet today. We bought it for $20. It’s white with ruffles around it. Very cute. I am thinking we can put our future baby in it for the first few months until he/she outgrows it then we’ll get a used crib. We also stopped by at Marshall’s to get some baby toys. I bought 2 baby items that cost me about $20. Expensive!!! Today I spent a total of $40 for our future baby.
I have been looking at craigslist a lot for cheap baby stuff. I learned that baby does not use stuff for that long because they wil outgrow the things we buy for them in a snap. So I am going to get most things second hand if possible. Of course, I can’t just get everything used. I am sure there will be things that I will need to get new. I guess I can always put those on the registry someday.
My husband has to work evening tomorrow at his part-time job. I will be at home by myself again I guess. I am going to try to clean up and do some works around the house. And cook for the next week.
I am on call this weekend so it’s not going to be fun but I am hoping it will be an easy weekend for me.
Tonight I asked my husband again if he is sure about having a baby next year. He said yes. So I guess we will be having a baby next year!! I am excited. I cannot wait the day the doctor tells me that I am pregnant. I will be the happiest woman in the world. I love my husband so much and I cannot wait to start a family with him. We have been married for almost 5 years and I think this is a good time for us to have a baby. I am hoping to have another one in 2011. I’d like to have 3 but we’ll see. I’ll be happy with one. We’ll see how we handle one baby first. I am so excited. I think about it everyday. I want to be a good mother. Our baby will bring my husband and me lots of luck, happiness, joy, fortune, and good life. This is why I cannot wait for his arrival.
I pray to the Blessed Mother and Jesus to bless us with a wonderful baby. I pray so that we will conceive soon. I pray so that we have a beautiful, healthy, and happy pregnancy. I want to be happy. I want to enjoy my life. I want to share what I have in life with our baby. I cannot wait!!!
Please pray so that God will bless us with pregnancy soon. Thank you.
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Christmas is almost here. I am so glad that I will not have to work on Christmas weekend. So glad. I do have to work from home this weekend but that is ok because I don’t actually have to sit at home all day.
My husband is working right now (at his part-time job). I miss him already.
This month is the last month I am taking birth control pills. Starting next week, I am stopping them. My husband and I are trying to conceive a baby. I am nervous. I hope everything will turn out okay. I have been taking my prenatal vitamin, folic acid and B12 vitamin (since I don’t eat meats) that my doctor prescribed me.
I have been looking for things for the baby. This always makes me happy. Knowing that next year my husband and I will have a baby. I am excited. I pray to Jesus and Virgin Mary that we will be blessed with a happy and healthy pregnancy. I pray so that I will carry a healthy and happy baby. I pray so that Jesus and Virgin Mary will bless me and my husband with a wonderful family.
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I am very happy today. We have decided to get pregnant!!! I am so excited. I know we don’t have much money saved up yet but I figured, we’d have at least 9 months to save and if we can save $1000 each month, that would be $9000 plus our current savings $4000 something. And then in March 2009, I should be getting a one-time bonus for about $13,000. So when the baby is born, we should have more than $20,000 saved. Aside from this, I know my parents are probably going to send me money for the baby as well. I am not going to count that now.
I am so happy. We will start trying in the coming weeks. I cannot wait to be pregnant and to be able to hold the baby. My husband is very excited to try as well.
Starting tomorrow, we’re going to get the house ready for the pregnancy. We will start cleaning up our future baby;s room. And I would like to tidy up the family room as well so that when I am pregnant, I have a nice space to relax.
Tomorrow at church, I am going to pray to the Blessed Mother Mary so that she will grant me a happy and healthy pregnancy. I am also hoping that she will also help me to find a way for me to financially afford to quit my job. I would like to quit my job after the baby is born. I would like to spend time with the baby. I want to watch it grow.
I guess now my husband and I will have to start saving our money for the baby. I was looking at target.com for baby items and everything costs so much. I am thinking we should get some stuff from the second hand shops to save money. I wouldn’t mind buying a gently-used clothings for the baby as long as they are descent looking. I have been buying lots of baby toys and baby books. I want to read to my baby a lot. I cannot wait. We are lucky our master bedroom is quite large. Perhaps we could put the baby’s crib in our room for the first few months.
I am just so excited right now. I hope I get pregnant soon. Then when we go back home in my country, I can share the good news with my families. Very exciting.
I cannot wait!!!! Starting tomorrow, my husband and I will need to start building the nest for the baby. Save as much money and enjoy the process I guess.
Please pray for me so that I will have a happy and healthy pregnancy.
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Monday was the Immaculate Conception feast day. I went to church at noon and it was packed. I had to sit all the way in the back. I was glad to make it. It was my first Immaculate Conception feast day mass. I said prayers and thanksgiving to Jesus, the Blessed Virgin Mary, and all the saints.
There was something that the priest said on Monday’s mass that stuck in my head. He said, nothing is impossible with God.
I did not go to church on Tuesday. I went today at noon. It was very peaceful. Today, the priest reminded us about the strength of the Memorare prayer.
I happen to pray the Memorare prayer a lot. Every day I say that prayer in fact.
~~~
Today was not a so-good day at work. I have been complaining about my workplace a lot on this blog if you notice. My group is a dysfunctional group. I have a manager, about 40 something and single, who likes for us to stay with him late at work. Well, most of us have families at home and we can’t stay at work for 10 – 12 hours a day. We have a family at home waiting for us. For him, no one is at home waiting for him so time is no issue. He can go home whenever he wants to. Then there are couple people do not like the manager and they are not afraid to walk all over him. Yet the manager can’t or don’t want to do anything. And to make things worse, most people are negative thinking. They are dragging everyone down to the hole. I can tell you, I try so hard to fuel in positive energy to the group. And I am starting to wear out. I really, really, really want to quit my job. I want it so bad I pray every day and evey night hoping for a miracle. I don’t know. Something please to happen so I can afford to quit my job. I don’t want to work in a toxic environment. Those people are negative and I do not want to spend almost half of my day with them. It is poisoning my life. I am begging and begging and begging to Lord Jesus Christ and the Blessed Virgin Mary to please grant me a miracle so I can just financially afford to quit my job.
I am so frustrated.
I want to quit my job but I make more money than my husband does and it makes it harder for me to quit. I just want to cry sometimes. Because I feel like I can’t do anything about it. I really really want to quit. I really do. But if I quit I don’t know how we survive financially. We’ll be okay for 3 – 6 months but I don’t know what else to do after that.
I pray every day and every night. When I am awake, at home or at work, I say prayers. Constantly. Sometimes the prayers would make me feel better at work.
I often cry at night. After I pray. I don’t know what else to do. I have some ideas of what I want to do for myself but I need capital/money for that and I don’t have that right now. Which means, I’d have to save for a long while and in this current economy this most likely means to stay at my current job, that I hate so much.
I don’t know if anyone else know how I feel. My work life is miserable. I don’t know how many more days I can go on. I pray so hard in the morning before I go to work hoping for a miracle.
I feel like I am on a deadend. I can’t do nothing about this. Like I have no choice. Often time, I ask myself why do I have to stay at my current job? I wish so much I could tell my boss I quit tomorrow. I wish. This is the one wish I want God to grant me. I want this to be my Christmas miracle. I want this to be my Christmas gift to me from whoever. I want this so bad. All I want is to be able to financially afford to quit my job. I wish my husband was making more than me. I wish I didn’t have to think so hard about this. I have so many other wishes but only this wish I want more than other wishes I have. And I don’t know how to convince God that. Aren’t my prayers mean something?
I wish I could scream so loud for the whole world to know how I feel right now. I hate my job. I want to quit. But I cannot afford it. My husband is not making enough money to afford both of us. And I feel so stuck. Stuck in my work place. A place I have to visit everyday. Five days a week. Eight hours a day. I don’t know for how many more days I have to wait. I know sooner or later God will have to answer my prayer and find me a way.
I wish I could open my chest for everyone to see how much it hurts in there to be at work feeling miserable eight hours a day or sometimes more. To pretend that I want to be there when I wish with all my heart I was somewhere else. To fake a smile on my face greeting everyone else. To force myself to think positive when the rest of the group is drowning me down in negativities.
There were millions moments where I had wished I won the lotto. There was not a second where I wasn’t imagining myself telling my boss that the day after tomorrow would be my last day. And when none of that happened, I’d tell myself, there is another day. And I take the day one at a time. I thought things would get better. But it is not. And it hurts me more.
Then I pray some. For a miracle. Something to happen. But it hasn’t happened. Then I cry. But that does not do anything. Then I pray some more. To make me feel better.
I believe in God. I believe in Mary. I believe in Jesus. And I believe in miracle.
You may not believe me but I know with all my heart, a miracle will come to me soon. And when that happens, I will send millions thanksgiving prayers to God and Mary and Jesus and all the saints who help me.
And then everyone will tell me you’re a … one lucky girl.
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The weekend went by pretty fast. I was on call (from work) on Saturday and Sunday so it wasn’t fun but nothing major happened and I am thankful for that.
My husband is still at his (part-time) workplace. I miss him so much. He left at 5 and it has been 6 hours since he left. Shortly after he left, I went grocery shopping. There were so many BOGO deals at the local supermarket so I got bunch of those things. I got home around 7PM and then I started cooking and cleaning up the house. I made lunches and dinners for my husband. I packed his lunch for tomorrow. I got done about 9PM. Then I had dinner–angel hair pasta with clams in tomato and garlic sauce. At around 10, I had the time to take shower. I felt so tired afterward. I am ready to go to bed. But I miss my husband so much. I wish he was here. I am glad he only has to work Thursday and Saturday this week.
I rented bunch of old movies from Blockbuster several days ago and I plan on watching them all week this week. Hopefully tomorrow, my husband would watch one of them with me. He is not a big fan of old movies.
I am so tired.
I need to read the bible first before going to bed. And say few Novenas to the Virgin Mary. I plan on going to the church to attend the Novena mass tomorrow at noon. I have done this for he last 3 months now. I love it. I always look forward to Monday noons.
I hope everyone had a great week. If you did, please do not forget to give thanks to God. He makes all things possible. May you will be followed by another great week ahead.
God bless everyone.
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All the talk about the recession and job losss makes me sad. I am thankful to have my my job–though I hate it–and to have a husband who also has a job. I am so thankful that we can still afford our life. I am so very, very thankful that we have savings in our bank accounts. Our cash saving is not much but at least it will be there when we need it. I realized that we’d need to save more money.
We managed to save another $250 this week. That makes our first phase saving goal to $4892. I might be able to pull an extra $108 to round that up to $5000 for this week at least. That way we’ll have $1000 to go. My goal is to get to save that extra $1000 in a month. So by mid January next year, we should hit our goal of $6000 saving. Starting January 2009, I would like to start to increase our cash saving by $500 per paycheck, which will equal to $1000 per month. By April 2009, I am hoping to be able to be debt-free (except for mortgage). By June/July 2009, I’d like to hit the $12,000 cash saving mark. By late summer 2009, I’d like to finish our house renovation. How? I am not sure for now but we’ll figure out a way.
Every year, like most people, I always have goals set up. At the end of the year, we usually have goals for the following year. Good in the beggining but around March…April… those goals seem to fade away. So one of my goals for 2009 is to keep all the promises I make to myself to last through year 2009.
I’d like to take more but it is getting late here. I better go to sleep. I will have a busy day tomorrow–just like today.
My message for tonight is for each one of us to thank God for all the blessings we receive. We might think we have nothing but believe me, there are millions–yes, millions–others who have less than us. Thank God and you will receive more. May God bring you joy, happiness, luck, health, and comfort in your life; today and always. Remember to always to smile because God loves each and everyone of us. And that is the greatest blessing anyone can have in their life.
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On Wednesday evening’s apologetic’s class, we learned about the angels, the devils, and exorcism. I learned that the Catholic church believes that each one of us has our own guardian angel. I also learned that we can actually talk to our guardian angel just like how we talk to other people. Quite interesting.
So the day after class, I searched online on guardian angels. I found out a whole lot more information. And that same day, I called my guardian angel. That was the “first time” I ever spoke to my guardian angel. I never knew I had one. So I started talking to him. Yes, it sounded like I was talking to myself. I called him to come to my life and to be a good guardian angel for me. I asked him to always guide me and to help me stay positive and be happy.
Amazingly, since then, I have been feeling pretty happy. Granted it has only been like 2 days but I am feeling pretty good with everything so far. I feel like everything in my life is going to be fine. My guardian angel has done a great job in keeping me on track with happiness. For the last 2 days, I think nothing but good things and happiness. I avoid toxic people and I keep close those who gravitate happiness. Life is more relaxing that way. I feel humbled to feel this way. I want my life to go to the right direction. It does not have to be perfect because who is perfect? No one is and no one has a perfect life. So it is ok if my life is not perfect. I do want to feel happiness in my life, though.
I have been talking to my guardian angel everyday for the last 2 days now. I called him to be in my dream last night but I couldn’t tell if he was there or not. I know I have a good guardian angel. I just know it.
It is truly an amazing feeling to not have to worry about little things anymore. Also, did you know that you could talk to someone’s else’s guardian angel? I tried to do that on Friday and it seemed to work. So I was happy about it.
Get to know your guardian angel and you’d be amazed on how a lovely experience it is.
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